"Today, if you become frightened, instead become inspired"

I always love Grey's Anatomy. I can't think of any other programme I've ever seen where such drive and ambition, even from women, is shown as a good thing.

Last week's episode (Give Peace a Chance) was, I think, my all time favourite. We got away from all the bickering of the past few weeks and everyone was focused on an impossible (banned by the Chief) surgery on an inoperable tumour.

Don't want to give anything away for people who plan to see it but I loved the sentiment of turning fear into inspiration.

The patient coaxed the doctor (McDreamy / Derek Shepherd - aka "the world's foremost neurosurgeon") into doing the surgery in a very calm but certain way (hard to pull off when you've been told you're going to die or end up paralysed): "Today, if you become frightened, instead become inspired".

When you think of your own life, is there a situation that leaps out at you as one which has or could inspire you but instead often frightens you into avoiding the risk?

What support do you need as you take this leap?

McDreamy needed support to get through the extremely long surgery and although he'd "gone rogue", had dozens of interns keen to help. The difference between the talks with the surgeons who were inspired and amazed and the risk-averse few was obvious.

Thinking back to your own life, have you spoken about the situation to people close to you?

How can you keep it from those who pour cold water on your dreams and instead get the support from people who truly want to see you succeed (and maybe even be a part of it themselves)?

What can you do differently, from today, to turn your fears into inspiration?

Take action against fear

"I am no longer afraid of storms, for I am learning to sail my own ship" - Louisa May Alcott

The author best known for her novel, Little Women, was quite a pioneer. Even though she lived in a time when women weren't supposed to work in most fields, let alone have their own dreams, she supported her family through her writing.

I love the idea of not being afraid of storms but worry that even if I knew how to sail, there'd still be all sorts of things I'd be scared of (I'm not great with the whole "letting go" and "trusting" yet).

Still, I love Louisa's advice. While I'll probably never sail the seven seas, there are all sorts of things I've learned about to help me feel less fearful in my day to day life.

A few years ago, I knew nothing about running my own business but I started my own coaching practice while launching myself as a freelance journalist and writer.

Five years on, while I think I was a bit crazy to do things in this way, I wouldn't trade it for anything. I learned what I could about making it work (taking lots of opportunities to build my tool kit with more training and so on) as I went along.

Now that I'm training as a psychosynthesis psychotherapist, I regularly feel way out of my depth. But I also know that, quite apart from counselling skills and practical applications, I'm learning stuff about myself and healing things I never thought could be healed and this will help me in ALL areas of life.

What "storms" do you fear in your life?

What kind of training could help alleviate some of your fears?

Who can you talk to about them? (Someone who has done what you're scared / excited about trying? Someone who'll support you as you make progress?)

Acknowledge the things you're afraid of and then take steps to storm proof your life as much as you can.

Once you feel confident that you've done whatever YOU can do, it will be that much easier to relax and trust that you can sail through the seas ahead...

Resilience and a positive attitude

I'm still feeling quite tearful after seeing Michael J Fox on Rachael Ray.

There's a lot of debate at the moment around luck and talent, mainly about people (understandably) feeling helpless and fearful about redundancies and opportunities.

But Michael has turned what most might see as a very negative situation into inspiration.

Not only for people dealing with Parkinson's but other chronic illnesses, job loss and any kind of adversity.

His bravery is astonishing.

He has kept his sense of humour but is also clearly serious about finding a cure.

No matter how demanding some of my clients might be, I can't imagine how his CEOs at http://www.michaeljfox.org/ feel - he says everytime he sees them, he asks "How's that cure coming?" Pressure!

But also, motivation...

Whatever your situation, research shows that people with a positive attitude are more likely to notice opportunities.

Neuroscience shows that we're better at negotiating when we feel positive, too.

But we're human.

And it wouldn't be natural to bounce back instantaneously - whether from rejection at an audition to losing a job you've held for decades or having a terrifying health diagnosis.

Michael says he kept his own diagnosis quiet for 7 years but when he came out about it, he realised that he was part of a community. He'd been missing out on support but probably wasn't ready to do it any sooner than he did.

Now, though, he says he doesn't have to lecture his kids about things like resilience as he demonstrates these essential qualities by example, on a daily basis.

Don't try to suppress natural reactions like sadness, shock and fear. Be gentle with yourself - whatever you're going through.

And don't be afraid to reach out for support from friends, family, online forums, your GP or whoever might be able to help you.

© Eve Menezes Cunningham / http://www.applecoaching.com/ 2009.