Developing patience

This is for myself as much as anyone else. I'm waiting (impatiently) for a delivery (new laptop - much needed) that should have arrived yesterday.

My reactions to waiting, while getting on with things that needed to be done, were increased stress and anxiety, distrust that it would turn up at all (true in the case of yesterday) and annoyance that several people suggested I could become more patient.

Like everything, it's easy to assume that the way we feel about things is the way everyone else would feel. But apparently, I'm more impatient about things like deliveries (rearranging work schedules to accommodate times given, waiting on hold etc.) than other people in my life claim to be.

What makes you feel most impatient?

Do you have any cures for impatience? (I find a little yoga helps along with doing something quite engrossing so I'm not waiting quite so actively but sometimes, even though I know there are things I can do to help, I just don't feel like it. It's as if I want to feel cross!)

I feel much better about it today than I did yesterday (and know how lucky I am to have such a high class problem. I have everything else I need and am grateful) but would love to hear tips and suggestions that can ease future waiting...

If only life could be a dvd

I'm terrible with suspense. If I'm waiting to hear about something important to me, I've learned to get on with other things and stay active but each time I think about the incoming verdict, wish I could fast forward.

I guess it started when I was little and couldn't handle the Nancy Drew cliffhangers. Even though I might be on book 13 out of hundreds, I'd worry she was going to die so would always flip forward to check that she was alive and well at the end. I still read enough of the end of books (not whole paragraphs but checking for certain names etc.) to reassure me as I progress. This makes more sense with the suspense filled Kathy Reichs, Sue Grafton, Janet Evanovich and Sara Paretsky but I do it with biographies, too. Autobiographies are a bit easier (they lived to tell the tale) but...

And when they finish a TV series with a cliffhanger, I regularly check online for episode guides (US sites normally have them up in advance) to check who's still alive and OK. "Spoiler alerts", they call them yet they enable me to enjoy what's coming without too much concern for all the fictional characters.

I'm an extreme case but can you think of areas in your life where suspense spoils things for you? How can you learn to enjoy it more? OK, if not enjoy it, manage it?

What else could you do so you're not waiting by the phone / letterbox / email?

Are there certain programmes and films you can watch with ease while others are too tense with suspense?

Think about the things that make you feel most anxious. What message might these storylines have for your own life?

© Eve Menezes Cunningham / www.applecoaching.com 2008.