I was feeling a bit run down last week so booked a hot stone massage for this evening. Now, having had a long weekend mainly off work, I'm arguing with myself about it.
I won't cancel but need to get rid of the guilt I feel about taking an hour (including the bike ride there and back) out when I have so much work to do.
Still, I know that I'll get much more done as a result...
Logically, I know (studies prove it again and again) that the best thing I can do for all areas of my life is to take some time out now and again to recharge.
So why such high resistance when it comes to actually doing it?
What kind of things (massage / exercise / meditation / daydreaming?) make you feel better?
Do you feel guilty about scheduling them in?
Cheryl Richardson, one of my favourite authors, calls it Extreme Self Care.
What can you start todya doing to put your own wellbeing higher on your list of priorities?
© Eve Menezes Cunningham / www.applecoaching.com 2009.
Showing posts with label guilt. Show all posts
Showing posts with label guilt. Show all posts
Tuesday, 14 April 2009
Thursday, 13 November 2008
How personally do you take things?
Even if you're the type of person feels responsible for absolutely everything, you can still learn to distance yourself. (As an "Eve" who was raised as a Catholic, I used to take on far more than my fair share of guilt.)
So instead of thinking that there's nothing you can do to change things, start thinking about the times when you notice it most.
Are you prone to oversensitivity when an issue has to do with your work? Family? Relationships? Or maybe any mention of your children is potentially explosive?
Start paying attention to any criticism (real, implied or even imagined) that you feel. Take a step back (emotionally if you can't do it physically) and simply ask yourself:
1) Does the person criticising have their own agenda which has absolutely nothing to do with me?
2) Is this something I feel that needs work?
3) Have other people ever said anything similar? (Even if this is the case, it's possible that they all had an agenda)
I'm not suggesting you ignore people's attempts to help you when that's what they're doing. But stop letting people's opinions run your life. As the old saying goes: "What other people think of me is none of my business".
By questioning criticism before absorbing it and deciding whether or not you choose to take it on board, you're immediately taking the sting out of it. And even if you decide to act on it, you'll be in a much stronger position.
© Eve Menezes Cunningham / www.applecoaching.com 2008.
So instead of thinking that there's nothing you can do to change things, start thinking about the times when you notice it most.
Are you prone to oversensitivity when an issue has to do with your work? Family? Relationships? Or maybe any mention of your children is potentially explosive?
Start paying attention to any criticism (real, implied or even imagined) that you feel. Take a step back (emotionally if you can't do it physically) and simply ask yourself:
1) Does the person criticising have their own agenda which has absolutely nothing to do with me?
2) Is this something I feel that needs work?
3) Have other people ever said anything similar? (Even if this is the case, it's possible that they all had an agenda)
I'm not suggesting you ignore people's attempts to help you when that's what they're doing. But stop letting people's opinions run your life. As the old saying goes: "What other people think of me is none of my business".
By questioning criticism before absorbing it and deciding whether or not you choose to take it on board, you're immediately taking the sting out of it. And even if you decide to act on it, you'll be in a much stronger position.
© Eve Menezes Cunningham / www.applecoaching.com 2008.
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