Have you heard of magical thinking?

When I first heard this expression, I thought it was a good thing, like the Law of Attraction squared.

But really, it's when we know what we want or need from a situation but instead of communicating openly with those in our lives, we wish they'd just understand.

Without us having to ask.

Remember the famous scene from The Break Up when Jennifer Aniston tells Vince Vaughn she wants him to want to do the washing up?

No one wants to wash up. (Although, as Monica, her old roomate in Friends, Courteney Cox Arquette seemed to.) Aniston's character probably didn't enjoy it (if she had, it wouldn't have been an issue).

How might she have communicated things in a way that would have been more likely to get him to respond in the way she hoped?

What are you refusing to ask for right now?

Are you sulking or holding back in some way because you feel let down that you're not getting it?

Whether you want your boss to offer you a pay rise (without actually putting your case forward or even letting her know you'd appreciate one) or your partner to do something, start thinking of ways you can be more direct.