Running in Heels - the importance of a positive attitude

I don't normally watch reality TV but am addicted (www.runninginheels.tv) to this. It follows three fashion interns at US Marie Claire.

I encourage my coaching clients to do whatever helps them feel better about themselves so they make bigger impacts when it comes to tackling larger goals. The good, positive, resourceful feelings have a ripple effect.

Research shows that people who feel happy are better at reading people, better at negotiating pay rises and better at spotting opportunities.

And, they get to feel happy, too.

One of the RiH interns is the opposite. Since the first day, almost every shot she's in shows her complaining about the other interns, whinging about her assignments, trying to make things harder for the other interns (by not sharing the odd opportunity) and generally being miserable.

It's possible that they've edited out all her little ray of sunshine moments but I'm finding her the hardest intern to sympathise with.

I wonder if the producers randomly picked one intern to give a worse first assignment to see what would happen.

But it's hard to watch her obsessing about her bad fortune. If she just focused on what she was meant to be doing instead of, e.g. postponing starting her assignment because she's eaten up with jealousy about another intern's (dodgy) approach, she'd prove herself more. It's not life or death stuff. But you can see, to her, it feels like it and it's eating her up.

If you're in a similar situation, thinking about the unfairness of your particular situation rather than marshalling your resources and getting out of it (or asking for help so the kind people around you can offer their support) think about what you can do, right now, to change your mind set.

What helps you feel better instantly? (Listening to a great song? Dancing around for a few minutes? A short run? A little yoga? A cartwheel? Watching or reading a little comedy?)

Even if you don't have room for any of this (at your desk at work, for example), you can take a moment to focus on your breath. This will instantly change your state and help you feel beter.

As your mood improves, you'll be better able to think of ways to ace that next assignment / make amends for that row or whatever has you feeling down.

© Eve Menezes Cunningham / www.applecoaching.com 2009.